I need to be better at this...

Here we are in the new year and I try to remind myself of all I've accomplished in the past year. I quit smoking, I lost 100 lbs, I had my first and only surgery, I left my husband and became officially divorced, I moved, I changed my number, I have mostly all healthy relationships, I've made new friends, I have connected with people I already knew (just not well), I joined a gym, I've gone on a few dates, and I think that's it. Am I bragging? Maybe a little. :) When I forget these things I can get pretty frustrated and feel like I am not making any progress. Thank God I have friends that remind me of all I HAVE done and I feel encouraged.

I moved into a house that my friend Adam owns. He lives here too, along with Mike (who I share a bathroom with), also a woman named Courtney but she is soon moving out and I will be meeting another new roommate that will take her place. Mike has been such a blessing - he cooks really good, he listens sometimes, but mostly he is so laid back sometimes I feel the need to check his pulse. He is a constant reminder not to take life too seriously, not to worry about things out of our control, and to think more rationally. Both Adam and Courtney are very driven people and all 3 of them encourage my health and weight loss. I am so blessed by the house I have come to call home.

I am sure you all saw on FB that a few weeks ago someone handed me a puppy in PetCo. She has already doubled in weight and she seems pretty smart. I am hoping she teaches Bettie some manners. Mike named her Whiskey and Adam calls her the "house dog". I absolutely love it.

I am sitting here in the house alone (Courtney is out of town and Mike and Adam are most likely at "drill" at the fire house.) and I am reflecting on my past year. How crazy. Had you told me this is where I'd be I would have told you you were NUTS. Single and living with 3 other people? Much lighter and smoke free? Nope no way- you're crazy. There are still days I miss Ryan so much it literally takes the breath out of me. But they are fewer. I take those moments to grieve what I thought I had and then I have to stand back up and keep walking.

Dating is SO weird. I want to find someone I can share this life with, someone to take on the world with me. With Ryan, hanging out was so easy. I don't remember an awkward moment. So I will have fun in the process of meeting new people, see where it might go, and hope that someone and I will fit easily together. And maybe Ryan was my only love for this life. Who knows? Just God. :)

So yeah, I am single, livin' with a couple of firemen... I like the way that sounds. :)

Maybe I will start blogging about the crazy weird dates I go on- keep you entertained with stories of awkwardness! :) Love you. Peace out. :)